大不一樣 (Joke)

Here’s a joke to show you how the same Chinese characters can give very different meanings only by changing the order they are put.

A woman asks her doctor: “I’d like to have a boob job, but what  difference will it make?”

“Well,” the doctor replies with composure, “There’re five possibilities:

1. 大不一樣 (da4 bu4 yi2 yang4)
2. 不大一樣 (bu2 da4 yi2 yang4)
3. 不一樣大 (bu4 yi2 yang4 da4)
4. 一樣不大 (yi2 yang4 bu2 da4)
5 樣大不一 (yang da4 bu4 yi)

All the five expressions are made up of the same four words with different orders and different meanings accordingly, except for 3, and 5, which have very similar meanings. Also, have you noticed that 不 is not  always pronounced with the same tone?

一樣means the same, which makes 不一樣 “not the same,” “different” because 不means “not.”

1. 大不一樣: Hugely different.大means big, huge, very much.

2. 不大一樣: Not exactly the same. Somewhat different.

3. 不一樣大: Not of the same size. (Oh, my!)

4. 一樣不大: The surgery doesn’t make any difference. They’re still of the same size—no big.  (Sue the doctor!)

5 樣大不一: Not of the same size.

大不一樣=大不一样

Packed like sardines (idiom)

Recently I went on a trip to Hong Kong. It was a short trip of only three days, as what we often call, 走馬看花 (zou3 ma3 kan4 hua), to look at flowers while riding on the horseback. What I got was only passing glances and superficial impressions.

Like any other big cities in the world, there’re big crowds of people on the downtown streets. Moving in the city is like moving in a stream of people. On the overpass, in the subway, on the way to the ferryboat, you’re always moving among people walking in two directions, most of which without much expressions and many of which with their earphones on. No wonder in Chinese we’ll use a lot of water-related idioms to describe what it is like with crowds of people or vehicles moving around, such as 川流不息(chuan liu2 bu4 xi2), and 水洩不通 (shui3 xie4 bu4 tong), where 川is  river whereas水, water.

Another expression for such jostling each other in a crowd would be 摩肩接踵(mo2 jian jie zhong3), literally meaning touching (摩, 接) each other’s shoulders肩and heels踵.

One morning when moving among the stream, however, a poem I read in college, some twenty years ago, flashed into my mind. It’s Ezra Pound’s “In a Station of the Metro” in 1911:

The apparition of these faces in the crowd;
Petals on a wet, black bough.

The textbook I read said this poem was a mimic of Japanese haiku, which is actually very Chinese. With those faces approaching, I imagined countless petals blossoming in front of mine.

I used to think Taiwan was a crowded place but when I saw those clusters of uprising buildings in Hong Kong, I realized how “big” Taichung, the city I’m living in, is comparatively. Closely they are standing very neatly to each other like fish scales or teeth of a comb. That’s what 鱗次櫛比(lin2 ci4 jie2 bi3) means. Spiderman will be thrilled swinging among them, I think. Perfect playground for him.

While watching the old buildings on the hill, I couldn’t help recalling those characters living in the stories told by Eileen Chang. Yes, this is a city where people are packed like sardines. Perhaps that’s why 范柳原(fan4 lie3 yuan2) and 白流蘇(bai2 lie2 su) could manage to meet each other in “Love in a Falling City.” And as a tram passed by the bus I was on, I seemed to be hearing the jingling sounds that make the background of so many of her stories. I began to realize that I love Hong Kong for the sake of Eileen Chang, not for anything else.

走馬看花=走马看花

水洩不通=水泄不通

鱗次櫛比=鳞次栉比

白流蘇=白流苏

低頭族 (up-to-date-term)

More than one thousand years ago, when the Chinese poet 李白, Li-bai put down one of his most well-known lines, “ 舉頭望明月，低頭思故鄉(ju3 tou2 wang4 ming2 yue4, di tou2 si gu4 xiang,”  “I look up at the bright moon, and then lower my head thinking about home,” he wouldn’t have foreseen that years later there would be a group of people labeled as “低頭族,” people who lower their heads.

    (from idn-news.com)

Ever since smart phones hit the market, we’ve seen more and more scenes as above: on the bus; in the train; in a restaurant or a coffee shop, where people meet and are supposed to talk or socialize with each other. . . . As a result, a new term was coined for those smartphone addicts--低頭族

Besides its literal meaning, 低頭also means surrender, giving in. Sometimes when people have to compromise, yielding to a stronger power, we’ll probably sigh and say “人在屋簷下，不得不低頭 (ren2 zai4 wu yan2 xia4, bu4 de2 bu4 di tou2), ” you have no other choice but to lower your head under eaves.

A more literary expression for 低頭 is 俯首(fu3 shou3). When confronted with hard evidence, a crime suspect insisting on his innocence may lower his head and confess. The act is called俯首認罪(fu3 shou3 ren4 zui4). Or you might lay down your arms and surrender to someone. In that case, 俯首稱臣(fu3 shou3 cheng chen2) will be proper for the situation.

On the contrary, when people are triumphant and making great strides with their heads up, you can say they’re 昂首闊步(ang2 shou3 kuo4 bu4). But people these days may lower their heads before they stride. Think about those Spanish football fans, what did they do first when their team won the 2012 European Football championship? Probably texted the news to friends or spread it on Facebook!

低頭族=低头族

舉頭望明月，低頭思故鄉=举头望明月，低头思故乡

人在屋簷下，不得不低頭=人在屋檐下，不得不低头

俯首認罪=俯首认罪

俯首稱臣=俯首称臣

昂首闊步=昂首阔步

Getting stood up (Slang)

“I got to tell you this!” My friend Agnes exclaimed to me, panting.

“But I’m starving!” She took a bite of the hamburger in her hand.

“We got stood up by the aboriginal driver who said he’d like to adopt two of the puppies. He kept us waiting for 40 minutes and his cell phone was off!”

“It sucks!” answered me with anger.

“Perhaps it’s better not to give those puppies to people of this kind. If he stood you up and turned his cell off, he’s irresponsible and will be likely to abandon the dogs when he doesn’t want them.” I concluded.

Previously I wrote about how my friend Spencer had lost his dog “Star” and got her back in the writing “完璧歸趙.” She’s delivered a litter of 7 puppies. Now the puppies are ready to leave their mother and we’re trying to give them away.

We often use to term “放鴿子(fang4 ge zi),” releasing a dove, to refer to the act of standing someone up, when someone makes an appointment with someone else but doesn’t show up, not because of irresistible causes. Sometimes a cabbie or a tour bus driver might make the passengers get off before reaching the destinations. Such act is also called放鴿子.

I really have no idea why we say that. One possible relation is the under-the-table gambling of dove race in Taiwan. To train the racing doves, the keepers would take them far away from home, set them free, and then go home without the doves. The doves have to find their way home. Probably this is why.

Another expression related to “放,” set free, is 放牛吃草(fang4 niu2 chi cao3), literally meaning to release the cattle to graze, leaving them alone.  Some parents ride with a loose rein when bringing up their children. You may use the expression to describe their attitude.

Back to the old times, before the cattle were replaced by machines in farming, the farmers would bring the cattle to a grass, releasing and letting them graze freely on the grass. There’s no need to bind or control the cattle. Such a “let-it-be” attitude thus is called放牛吃草.

It turned out that my friends were not 放鴿子. The driver was stuck by a mud slide in the mountain, where the two puppies are now running around happily growing up, I believe.

完璧歸趙=完璧归赵

放鴿子=放鸽子

氣味相投 (Idiom)

I read on the paper that there have been so-called “pheromone parties” in some cities, where guests find their match by smelling. Before the parties, each guest has slept in a T-shirt for three nights in a row to capture their odor. Each T-shirt is put into a bag and assigned a number for the guests to smell. People in the parties find their dates based on scents.

In Chinese we have an idiom for this perfectly. When two people have a lot  in common, sharing similar interests or temperaments and are compatible with each other, we often say they’re氣味相投 (qi4 wei4 xiang tou2), having compatible scents.

According to Wikipedia, A pheromone is a secreted or excreted chemical factor that triggers a social response in members of the same species. Long before the term was coined, Chinese had used the idiom to describe people turning into friends because they have compatible scents.

Sometimes we might jokingly change it into “臭味相投(chou4 wei4 xiang tou2) ” to make fun of what we like. 臭味is stink.

You might be wrong if you think everyone likes fragrant smells. Some people, unlike most other, may have unique tastes and prefer stinky ones. We have a term for these people, 逐臭之夫(zhu2 chou4 zhi fu)，man who chase after smelly.

Another thing I’d like to bring up here is that in English we use “romantic chemistry” to refer to a romantic attraction between two people. In Chinese we use “electricity” as we say 來電 (lai2 dian4), literally meaning “having electricity.” Don’t mix this up with another condition, when someone’s calling you on the phone, we may also say “someone just來電. “

Pheromone or scent, they’re all chemistry in fact. I guess these terms all make sense.

氣味相投=气味相投

來電=来电

Pork’s feet with thin noodles (Custom)

I think it’s a good idea to sell 豬腳麵線(zhu jiao3 mian4 xian4), pork’s feet with thin noodles, outside Taiwan’s prisons. Why? What’s so special about the food?




You might have seen such a scene from Taiwan’s news: A celebrity comes home from prison after doing his time, greeted by his family with a dish like this. Without exception he will eat the food, some even accompanied by a ritual called 過火(guo4 hou3), stepping over burning flames.

It’s been Taiwanese’s belief that eating豬腳麵線 can rid people of ill luck. So people eat 豬腳麵線 to get rid of ill luck. People who just leave prison or survive a disaster such as a car crash certainly have some ill luck to kick away. This is why they eat pork’s leg—let the pig’s feet do the kicking!

And 麵線, fine noodles, symbolize longevity since they’re long. Back in grandma’s time, people ate豬腳麵線 on their birthday. They were cautions about not cutting off the noodles while cooking or taking them into the bowls, which is a bad sign—cutting off your longevity.

These days those who sell豬腳麵線must be happy, because we have another custom that is related to this food. This year we have an extra lunar fourth month, which is called intercalary month, 閏月(run4 yue4), which is said to be bad for parents’ longevity. So those married daughters will get 豬腳麵線 for their own parents as a wish for their health and longevity.

Well, for Taiwanese sometimes food is not only food. Got some bad luck to kick away? Let the pigs do the job for you. What about kicking ass? That I don’t know.

豬腳麵線=猪脚面线

過火=过火

閏月=闰月

完璧歸趙 (idiom)

Four days after I wrote “狐群狗黨” talking about my friend Spencer’s dog, Star’s missing, she returned. She was captured by a certain animal protection organization and her photo was posted online. Spencer not only has two dogs fight now, for he adopted a puppy during Star’s missing, but he’s expecting a litter of puppies!

When you retrieve something you’ve lost, we call it失而復得(shi er2fu4 de2). If something precious is returned intact, we’ll use the idiom 完璧歸趙(wan2 bi4 gui zhao4)

During Warring States Period 戰國時代(zhan4 guo2 shi2 dai4), (476BC to 221BC), King of state of Zhao got 和氏璧(he2 shi4 bi4), jade of He family, which was a very precious gem. Learning the news, King of state of Qin sent a letter to king of Zhao offering an exchange of the jade for 15 cities. King of Zhao was stuck in a dilemma. He had a doubt if he would get a fair deal since State of Qin was much stronger and its king was known for his ambition.

Someone recommended 藺相如(lin4 xiang4 ru2) as an ambassador to State of Qin to handle the deal. Lin asserted King of Zhao had to take the risk so that state of Qin wouldn’t have the excuse to invade state of Zhao.

After showing the jade to King of Qin, Lin observed that the king didn’t show any intention to keep his words, so he claimed that he’d like to show King of Qin a flaw on the jade and got back the jade.

Standing by a big pillar, Lin remarked that King of Zhao had neglected others’ opposition and taken his proposal to accept the deal because he believed that as a leader of a great state, king of Qin would keep his promise. But it seemed that he had been wrong. He showed an intention to hit the pillar and crash the jade after the speech.

King of Qin made a fake promise for fear that Lin should smash the jade. Detecting King of Qin’s real intention, Lin delayed the deal till five days later with an excuse but detached someone to send back the jade.

Instead of killing Lin, King of Qin let go of Lin. And the jade was returned to State of Zhao intact, which is why we use the idiom完璧歸趙 today. 完璧means the intact jade; 歸趙 returned to state of Zhao.

We also use the term to 完璧describe a virgin girl as in完璧之身(wan2 bi4 zhi shen), a body of intact jade. In terms of this, it’s not so proper to use the term 完璧歸趙 to this incident of Star’s coming back. For she’s now with puppies and we’re all looking forward to seeing them.

What if you give something but never get it back? We’ll say it’s 肉包子打狗, to hit a dog with dumpling stuffed with meat. It will end up 有去無回(you3 qu4 wu2 hui2), never getting it back.

完璧歸趙=完璧归赵

狐群狗黨=狐群狗党

失而復得=失而复得

有去無回=有去无回