完璧歸趙 (idiom)

Four days after I wrote “狐群狗黨” talking about my friend Spencer’s dog, Star’s missing, she returned. She was captured by a certain animal protection organization and her photo was posted online. Spencer not only has two dogs fight now, for he adopted a puppy during Star’s missing, but he’s expecting a litter of puppies!

When you retrieve something you’ve lost, we call it失而復得(shi er2fu4 de2). If something precious is returned intact, we’ll use the idiom 完璧歸趙(wan2 bi4 gui zhao4)

During Warring States Period 戰國時代(zhan4 guo2 shi2 dai4), (476BC to 221BC), King of state of Zhao got 和氏璧(he2 shi4 bi4), jade of He family, which was a very precious gem. Learning the news, King of state of Qin sent a letter to king of Zhao offering an exchange of the jade for 15 cities. King of Zhao was stuck in a dilemma. He had a doubt if he would get a fair deal since State of Qin was much stronger and its king was known for his ambition.

Someone recommended 藺相如(lin4 xiang4 ru2) as an ambassador to State of Qin to handle the deal. Lin asserted King of Zhao had to take the risk so that state of Qin wouldn’t have the excuse to invade state of Zhao.

After showing the jade to King of Qin, Lin observed that the king didn’t show any intention to keep his words, so he claimed that he’d like to show King of Qin a flaw on the jade and got back the jade.

Standing by a big pillar, Lin remarked that King of Zhao had neglected others’ opposition and taken his proposal to accept the deal because he believed that as a leader of a great state, king of Qin would keep his promise. But it seemed that he had been wrong. He showed an intention to hit the pillar and crash the jade after the speech.

King of Qin made a fake promise for fear that Lin should smash the jade. Detecting King of Qin’s real intention, Lin delayed the deal till five days later with an excuse but detached someone to send back the jade.

Instead of killing Lin, King of Qin let go of Lin. And the jade was returned to State of Zhao intact, which is why we use the idiom完璧歸趙 today. 完璧means the intact jade; 歸趙 returned to state of Zhao.

We also use the term to 完璧describe a virgin girl as in完璧之身(wan2 bi4 zhi shen), a body of intact jade. In terms of this, it’s not so proper to use the term 完璧歸趙 to this incident of Star’s coming back. For she’s now with puppies and we’re all looking forward to seeing them.

What if you give something but never get it back? We’ll say it’s 肉包子打狗, to hit a dog with dumpling stuffed with meat. It will end up 有去無回(you3 qu4 wu2 hui2), never getting it back.

完璧歸趙=完璧归赵

狐群狗黨=狐群狗党

失而復得=失而复得

有去無回=有去无回

狗腿 & 馬屁 (Animal)

Very often when we pass by our dog Prince, who’s lying prone idly with his legs spreading on the ground, we’ll watch his legs and say: “好大的狗腿！ (hao3 da4 de gou3 tui3)” –“How big his legs are!”

When we call someone 狗腿, it means that he’s a brown-noser, someone who gains favors, such as a promotion, a raise by kissing ass.

It is said that there once was a rich man who broke his leg. To please him, a servant offered to have his own leg cut and given to his master.

“What about your own leg?” asked the master.

“I can have a dog’s leg,” replied the servant.

“What about the dog’s leg?”

“Make him one out of mud.”

This is why a dog has to raise a hind leg when he pees—so that the leg made of mud won’t be washed off.

Besides狗腿, the horse is also used in describing the same act of kissing ass. Literally it means “patting the horse’s ass”—拍馬屁(pai ma3 pi4) People who are good at this are labeled as馬屁精(ma3 pi4 jing) .

But kissing ass doesn’t always succeed. Sometimes you think you’ll please someone by your 馬屁. Instead of pleased, however, this person just got annoyed because you play the trick wrong or he’s too smart to be fooled. We’ll say, instead of patting the horse in the ass, you pat it in the leg. 馬屁拍到馬腿上了(ma3 pi4 pai dao4 ma3 tui3 le)

Another dog-related term would be 狗嘴裡吐不出象牙(gou3 zui3 li3 tu3 bu4 chu xiang4 ya2), a dog’s mouth emits no ivory. You can never expect wise advice from a foolish man, or elegant talk from a filthy mouth.

Speaking of mouth, sometimes 烏鴉, crow, will be connected with it to be 烏鴉嘴. Chinese believe that crow cawing could be a bad sign and bring ill luck. So when someone says something unlucky that seems to be a curse, people might stop him by calling him a “craw’s mouth.” 烏鴉嘴

On the afternoon before Taiwan’s 921 Quake happened in 1999, I was informed that I would have some extra classes on the next day, which meant I would have 7 periods the next day. Learning this, I told my niece I wished the next day would be a day off. But there wouldn’t be any typhoon. “What about an earthquake?” It slipped out of my tongue. I didn’t mean it but that midnight, the 7.3-magnitute happened and claimed thousands of lives.

This is my personal experience of playing a烏鴉嘴, a very big one.

馬屁精=马屁精

狗嘴裡吐不出象牙=狗嘴里吐不出象牙

烏鴉嘴=乌鸦嘴

Divination (III) (Mystery)

5. 占星(zhan4 xing) Astrology:  In ancient China, astrology was also used to forecast a country or an emperor’s future. A lot of emperors had astrologers as their counselors. They monitored closely for the relative positions or movements of the celestial bodies.

It is also used as a form of fortune-telling for individuals. 紫薇斗數(zi3 wei2 dou3 shu4) is probably the most well-known system. It is the study of a person’s life based on the movement and location of the Zi Wei Star and other stars at the specific time the person was born.

6. 占夢(zhan mong4) Dream interpretation: Speaking of interpreting a dream, you have to know a book called 周公解夢(zhou gong jie3meng4), which consists of interpretations of seven kinds of dreams and is passed along with anonymous authors. As I know, it has nothing to do with the historic figure周公. But in the Chinese language, we often use the term “夢周公” (meng4 zhou gong) to refer to sleeping.  

7. 八字相命(ba zhi4 xiang4 ming4)  Four Pillars of Destiny: It’s telling one’s personality and fate by his 八字, “eight characters of birth time.” It’s called “eight characters” because each of the four pillars (representing the year, month, day, and hour of one's birth respectively) is represented by two characters. It shows the relative position of the sun when one was born. Philosophy of陰陽五行(yin yang2 wu3 xing2),Yin & Yang, the Five Elements (gold, wood, water, fire, earth) are utilized in telling one’s fortune here.   

8. 易經卜卦(yi4 jing bu3 gua4)：易經，the Classic of Changes, one of the oldest texts, contains a divination system. 八卦(ba gua4), referred to as "trigrams" in English, is eight diagrams used in Taoist cosmology to represent the fundamental principles of reality, seen as a range of eight interrelated concepts. The eight trigrams are extended into 64. One of the ways to divine is flip three coins to get different head -tail combinations, each of which represents one of the 64 trigrams. The trigram is interpreted according to易經as a prediction for the future.

9. Animal: Some people use animal to divine. For example, I’ve seen birds do the job. You ask a question then the bird picks up an answer for you. I heard that roosters are used too.  You might want to see this on YouTube: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GcS0AWB8wzA&feature=related  

A friend told me that by chance he once got a “book” of his destiny, which records important occurrences of his life. He read it until the part to the end of that year. He stopped there because he didn’t have the nerves to go on. Some event, though seen much unlikely when he was reading it, really came true later.

For thousands of years, people have been trying very hard to have a peep into the future. We’re always wondering what will happen tomorrow or further ahead, or sometimes we’re just too confused or too weak to decide which way to go. So we resort to an old mysterious way, divination.

I think it’s good to know the weather forecast as to decide what to wear or if you should go out with an umbrella. But foreseeing the future, like who you’re gonna marry or when you’re gonna die?

I think I’ll do the same if I should have the chance to get my “book” as the friend mentioned above. I don’t think I’ll open and read it. Like a Hong Kong science fiction novelist 倪匡(ni2 kuang) put in one of his novels, what is the fun of life if you live it like reading yesterday’s newspaper?

(THE END)

紫薇斗數=紫薇斗数

周公解夢=周公解梦

陰陽五行=阴阳五行

易經=易经